The RedHead Papers

For lunch today, Fred and I had tuna club sandwiches with bacon. And we got it to go. So we could…sit in the conference room and watch Passions. You heard me. When the drunken, gay, evil magical midget appeared in his red satin outfit and red cowboy boots and started dancing and ogling the nubile young witch girl even though he was clearly a big fat ‘mo, Fred actually spit tuna all over the conference room table and I think I fell out of my chair. We were laughing so hard that I may have choked on a lung. I love this place — where else can you sit with your gays and watch horrific soaps while you eat lunch? I mean, besides prison, obviously.